Growth

Well I've been gone for a while doing some self-reflecting and trying to get myself together on all aspects of my life. I always used to wonder how I can be a better person. What can I do to be the person that I want to be. Putting God first in my life is the first thing that I had to recognize that needed to change. Secondly self-reflecting when I get into situations that don't seem to be working towards a positive vibe to see what position I play in them. Taking a step back and looking at things from the outside gives me a greater perspective on what where stand not only in that situation, but as a person. Sometimes you have to let go. You have to grow up. You have to persevere to get to where you want to go and to be who you want to be. That is the road that I am on now. My road to success.

Taking a break....

It's been a while since I've been here to blog but I've had a lot going on. Life has thrown me so many curve balls that I didn't know which way that I was going. Getting to know myself has been a wonderful yet difficult process. I learn more and more everyday and it's amazing while draining. My writing is coming back to me slowly and I am definitely going to share. Until then I will continue to listen and learn more and more. Be back soon.

Different.....

For some strange reason today is a different day not a day of difference but a different day. Not the same shit, not the same day. Emotionally I feel different. Something has changed. Something evolved. Today. What you ask, what you wonder? I have no clue. Ever had a moment in the day, week, month, year even your life well you just felt different but couldn't explain and didn't even know why? Well today is that day for me. A day that's different. Being tired of being tired gets old too. I don't want to be tired. I'm tired of having the same repetitive conversations with myself about people that are in control of their lives and their stupidity. Doesn't simplicity get old? The simple never get tired of being simple? They don't want one challenge a year? I don't know what's happening. Am I evolving past and away from those that live a different life than myself? Am I growing up? Am I taking my life more seriously? I don't know what exactly is going on in my world that's going to change things from this day forward but I can feel it and whether or not I'm prepared now or ever will be will be determined later....... Stay tuned.

Obama & The Black Family

You know from the second paragraph of this article down to the end my mouth was hung open waiting for something to fly in it or some slob to drop out of it. The Cosby's do not count for anything because THEY'RE not real. There are plenty of powerful, successful, and rich black people that exist in today's society that have educated mothers AND fathers and well-mannered, educated, successful children. That's a crock of shit. Don't act like the Obama's are the first to do it in America. I love them don't ever get that twisted, but lets be honest with ourselves. Every black person is not uneducated, ill-mannered, or from the projects. Every black family in America does not consist of just a MOTHER. And if it does there are a lot of women raising their kids, while working very good jobs with their degrees and raising successful children who do the same. I am so bothered by the idea that people, black and white, feel so negatively about ALL BLACK people. Are there some project folk out there? Yes. Are there some Bebe's kids out there? Yes. Are there some white people that hail from the slums? Yes. Are there some white people that are considered "white trash"? Yes. Are there some ignorant ass mofos in the world black and white? YES! So lets look at it for what's it worth and not what you want it to be. Powerful black men have white women or women that's light, bright, and damn near white so Obama having a dark-skinned lets black people know that black is beautiful? Seriously? I needed to see Michelle Obama to feel being black is beautiful, that being black is okay? Really? Oh I'm sorry I didn't know that I had no self-esteem or self-worth without seeing a black educated woman. I must have missed that email. I was also left out of the loop that alerted black people that all couples argue in public and disrespect each other. Black people and manners or respect must never go in the same sentence with the word relationship huh? America needs to know and realize that ALL BLACK PEOPLE ARE NOT THE SAME. More of America needs to get out from behind their cubicles, under their rocks, out of their little world more and experience life. Its a whole nother world that exists out there and it can not be found on TV.

Read Below: http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/01/15/obama.family/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

Well, well, well......

I haven't been up here since November?!? That's crazy. Where does time go? I mean really 2008 is here and gone. For real. Well as I lay here in silence and darkness I am forced to think. Think of one thing. Me. What am I doing with myself? What would I like to do with myself? What am I going to do with myself? Emotionally I am working on getting myself together; for my children. They are looking at everything that I do. From the clothes I wear, to what type of shows I watch on television, to who I associate with. So ladies and gentleman it is not a game. I have to be as close to perfect for their good as I can be. What's good for me has to be better for them. Spiritually I am focusing on growing closer to God. That's too personal to share. Physically I'm working out and feeling great. Mentally I start class Feb 4 so I will be more stimulated than the worldly treasures and knowledge that I discover on my own all while moving closer to my goals. I must say God has truly blessed me and as I live life I realize everyday that I think of the past is nothing more than a day that I am wasting. Tomorrow is no more than a comfortable term for laziness as we put off what we don't want to do today. Tomorrow has never been and will never be guaranteed. Live your life and play the hands that your dealt. If you were dealing the cards you wouldn't be living. Take nothing or anyone for granted for the same one you dislike today may be the one you need later. Enough of my rambling. More thoughts to come and soon. Live your life. Goodnight.

Perception

"Men are disturbed not by things, but by the view which they take of them."
- Epictetus

Everyone has their own perception of things. It is that perception that allows them to view things. What happens when that perception is believed to be the only way to think and the right way? It no longer becomes only a perception, but an opinion, their opinion. Have you ever had a conversation with someone who you gave 110% of your attention to listen and absorb what they were saying? At the end of the speech you give your perception of the same topic, not only they made you feel that your thoughts didn't matter to them, but that they were wrong and then made you feel belittled for not thinking the same way as them? Hmmmm. What do you think next? Well I know what I think next. The next time they want to talk to me about something they will get the blank stare, the uh huhs, yeah, I see's and quietly I think to myself WHY DON'T YOU SHUT TF UP AND TELL SOMEBODY WHO CARES? I don't......

Time for change

Barack Obama getting into office means so many things to me including the fact that he made history. Obama is and should be an example to every black man and person in America. I say black men because that is one of our problems and black men have always had a struggle being seen in any type of positive light. Every individual person in America should be touched, inspired, and influenced by having a black president. If this doesn't make everyone step their game up and feel a strong sense of hope that they can achieve ANYTHING, then you never wanted more for yourself anyway. How can you not think to yourself that you CAN get a promotion at your job, that you CAN stop selling those drugs, that you CAN work and go to school and raise your kids, that you CAN be a great role model and parent to your kid(s), that you are worth it, that you CAN be the underdog and still rise above and excel in all areas of your life? American believed that he CAN be and will be a great president. Obama carried himself with so much poise, integrity, and respect during the elections letting America know that he can win without the dirt and lessening of self-respect, did that speak to you and how you should carry yourself? Did it make you think more about what's more important in life? It made me think about what is the best way for me to win in my own life. What do I want my children to know and believe in? How do I want to portray myself in their eyesight? I want to be a role model so I must live as one. It can't be only in their presence because you never know who's watching you when they're not around. I must accord myself as if they're around me all of the time. If Barack Obama, a black man, the president of United States of America can't raise the value of your family to you and make you want to step up to the plate and succeed in your life and make you feel that you can, I say to you, WHO CAN?